September 7, 2012

Kerri's DIY Repair of Sticky-Out Ear

Yesterday I was inspired by the brilliant vlog of my gorgeous-as-she-is friend Eden. And it gave me a idea that I had to see through.
I decided to have an otoplasty - surgery to pin back a sticky-out ear.

Those of who who know me know that I have one sticky-out ear, which makes the left side of my head look like I could take off like Dumbo the elephant in a gust of strong wind. The other side, however, is completely normal. So I'm stuck between Dumbo on the left and Human on the right. I'm in some kind of limbo. Dumbo-limbo, if you will. And it's absurd.
Not my left ear. But very similar.
 
 
Sadly, though, I can't afford plastic surgery right now, due to annoying things like the mortgage and needing food.

So I thought I'd do it myself.

I do have some experience with invasive self-surgery, having pierced my ears twice with a safety pin. One time the ear got infected and closed up, but that's still a 50% success rate.
Still, when I tried to make the incision, I realise I couldn't see the back of my ear because my eyes are actually at the front of my face. So I had to satisfy my desire for perfection by sticking my ear to my head with a lump of blue tac. It looked very nice, and gave me a very flat ear, but kept springing up again within five or six seconds, and proved a little cumbersome to maintain.

So for now, I'll just plod along in Dumbo-limbo. But if blu-tac wishes to sponsor me, I'll certainly be receptive to that.

8 comments:

  1. The superglue thing may work. I accidentally got two fingers stuck together yesterday while 'fixing' something and it took ages to get them apart!

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  2. Piercing your own ears reminded me of when I was a first year nurse.Way back in the dark ages the third year nurses would offer to pierce the newbies ears with ice,needles and alcohol swabs from work.It was a form of entertainment for them as some would scream if the ice had not numbed enough or drip blood everywhere and if they were really lucky some would faint.I was so glad mine were already done!
    So you doing your own....go you brave lady :) xx

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  3. In days gone by, or days of yore if you prefer, babies who were born with sticking out ears often had them taped back for a few weeks (with medical tape), until the cartilage firmed enough to hold them in that position. Usually the first couple of months or so. such a shame Liz didn't know about that trick to help little Prince Charlie. I guess it's a bit late for you to try that now.

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  4. Kerri, I can lend you a staple gun. :-D Alcohol will deaden any discomfort, you may feel......

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  5. what about double sided tape?? Or tie a string around your whole head to tuck the ear in?? ;)

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  6. If you superglue that ear back you'll finally be able to do that one eyebrow arch trick.
    Disclaimer: this may not be true.

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